the gluten-free diet

As I am typing this, I am heaving a very large sigh.
I am gluten-free.
I have not been diagnosed by a doctor with a gluten allergy, but evidence quickly leads me to this particular conclusion.

The reason for my heavy sighs as of this particular moment, is because I took a chance.
I took a chance - and failed.
Kind of.

You see, I have been gluten-free for about a year and a half now, and I usually just don't eat any products that have gluten substitutes. (gluten free bread, baking products, etc. Except I eat so many gluten free cookies. so. many.)

So this past grocery trip, I decided I would go out on a limb and try some gluten substitute items.

Fun fact about me, I LOVE. and I mean LOVE, any kind of bread. Any type of food with bread in, on, or next to it interests me. Except too bad for me though because my small intestine sees gluten and is like, "Yeah, no way in hell, honey" - and I'll stop there.

So I miss my bread.

I got some gluten free English Muffins. Cue Card: MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM.
RIGHT!?

Except, wait.
Oh, SORRY. But the package failed to tell me that it would take me TWENTY MINUTES to separate ONE english muffin. ONE. ENGLISH. MUFFIN.

ONE.

So by the time I had my egg all fried and ready to hop into a warm and cozy english muffin, I was still battling the muffin on the counter (that I had just cleaned) and now there are crumbs everywhere and I just don't have the heart to exert any more effort.

So, now, the English Muffin has been thoroughly toasted, and I'm not hungry anymore. Because I was able to cook two whole fried eggs to put INSIDE of the muffin, before I was even able to separate the muffin.

THE END.
cooking sucks.

What's for lunch?

What's for lunch you ask?

Well, if you MUST know... THESE GUYS!

HA! JUST KIDDING! GOTCHA.
Anyways. I'm actually having a delicious salad at Panera. [Pause for a shoutout to the sweet old man next to me wearing a "STOP, FORREST, STOP" shirt. awwwwwww. Old people]

So... I know I haven't posted in a while. And honestly the only reason I am probably posting this right now is because of sweet Laura Ketola.

TIME OUT TO PROCRASTINATE ACTUALLY BLOGGING ABOUT MY MAIN POINT:
1. I am all for procrastinating
2. that is why I empathize with Laura's need to have something, ANYTHING on the internet to distract her from her actual studies.
3. Among such FABULOUS websites such as facebook and PINTEREST (which I am NOT addicted to... contrary to popular belief), I am proud that she would consider my inconsistent blog a stumbling block of the world wide web.
Thank you, Laura. I truly am honored.

OKAY BUT FOR REAL.
I AM SICK. This in an of itself is a misfortune.
HOWEVER. (catch up time) I live with 5 boys. And no, I am not talking about brothers or dads. I am talking about my 5, grown up, college boy, roommates.
Overall, I absolutely love living in a housefull of boys. There is hardly any drama, they are STILL under the impression that I can cook (I can't, but they make me feel better about that), and they also motivate me to clean...
[Side note; did you know that when boys miss the toilet, you have to clean the UNDERSIDE of the toilet!?!?! GAH. Who knew!?]
But one of the downfalls is this. It may be surprising to you, but I have an obsessions with not wearing clothes. I LOVE being stylish and having wonderful clothes, but when I am home, the pants and bra come OFF.
Now, I'm sure you can image what an uproar this would bring if I flung open the door, welcomed by a couch-full of boys drinking beer and playing Super Smash Brothers, and began to strip. NOT in the sexy way, mind you.
I believe this type of behavior would not be welcomed with open arms.

To conclude this sad little story, I have settled for locking my door, and THEN commence the pantslessness that I call my life. I feel imprisoned by my own need to not wear anything but a shirt. I can't even walk to the kitchen to get a glass of water or to start the coffee without putting on a bra. BUM. MER.

I can't think of any clever way to end this blog entry. So BYE, LAURS.

PS sorry for all the caps... I feel awkward now.

oh dad..

Sooo, not much has happened during day 2 of being mom, despite the one real-life tornado that I napped through. I guess it's a good thing when nothing happens worth blogging about.

Oh except for when I got in my bed last night. (exhausted, having only slept for a collective 7 hours ALL weekend. all. week. end. tired.) My nose then directed my attention to a certain potent and very disagreeable odor, which turned out to be a little "present" from the cats.

Please allow me to go off on a tangent at this particular moment. I hold a very strong opinion about cats. Basically, I believe that all cats are lazy, self-righteous, lacking in personality, and pretty much a waste of anyone's time, space, or breathing air.

That being said, I cannot tell you with written words how I felt upon discovering this. Lets just say the first words that came to my mind were not G-rated. I then took the opportunity to wash all my bedding. Isn't that completely normal? Washing sheets at such an ungodly hour?
...I double-washed just to be safe.

In other news, the weather has been testing everyone's limits today. Earlier today I was texting my dad (who is staying with his parents in Chattanooga), and our conversation went something like this:

dad: sitting in dark at mama and daddy's. storm hit sig mtn hard. prob no power for a couple days. lost 1 big oak and rv shed on garage. House is fine, send krystals.
me: ... are you asking for krystals hamburgers?
dad: The #1 combo would be fine: 4 krystals, fries and a diet coke.
me: ... I'll get that to you as soon as possible.
dad: Thx.

In case you have absolutely no sense of humor whatsoever, the irony in this conversation is that the only thing he wants is krystals. Not for the power to come back on, or even the revival of that big oak tree... just krystals.
I've debated sending that text conversation to crazythingsparentstext.com (which has been one of my most recent internet obsessions. You should check it out), yet I am still undecided.
-mom

update.

Dear Fellow Bloggers,

I'M BACK!

I have returned from my two month long Sabbatical (I can't tell you how long it just took me to spell that word). I know you all have been biting your fingernails and holding on to your horses just waiting for the day that I write a new post. Well, blogging world, today is your lucky day! (I would like to now give a shout-out to my two readers, HANNAH ZEHRING and LAURA KETOLA. love you guys).
Tons has happened since I last sat down to reveal all my secret thoughts. I am currently taking a semester off of school and trying to figure out where the heck to go from here. I am also living at home.
Which brings me to our next segment called:
THE PERKS OF BEING A LIVE-IN BABYSITTER/MOM
For those of you who are unaware, I am second in the lineup of a family with 6 kids. I am the oldest girl. This makes me very eligible for many things including the obvious: babysitter, cook (failure), maid, pep-talker, and all-around best daughter award. I have thus embraced these titles along with the not-so obvious such as: dance party organizer, nail-painter, boxcar derby maker, and an overall general encyclopedia.

My parents are out of town for the week, leaving my brother and I in charge of the pack. It's like herding sheep. Or giving a cat a bath. Nearly impossible.

Tonight's endeavors lead to the following:
1. dinner of chicken shaped like dinosaurs and volcano potatoes
2. dinner conversation convincing my 15 year old sister that she is adopted. from China.
3. an after dinner dance party accompanied by music from glee
4. which evolved into everyone leaving
5. and then me serenading my dog with Katy Perry's Teenage Dream.
6. then discovering my little sister armed with the phone and the yellow pages. not good.
7. then ALSO discovering my other little sister carrying around fingernail polish remover. without the lid. she is five. even more not good.
8. me reading goodnight moon.
9. me taking my sister's temperature because her belly button hurt... yeah. I know.

So far so good. Everyone is alive. No broken bones. No hurt feelings. No fevers (despite the belly-button scare). I think we might all survive this one.
Until next time,
mom (h.)

this night...

It's funny how a student can reach that one certain time (for me it is 1:46 on the dot) and realize that they ultimately have two options.

1. get in bed NOW and try to sleep.

now this option is tricky, because it is not always guaranteed that the student will actually FALL asleep. It is very likely that said student will simply lie in bed feeling guilty that they are no longer studying or doing whatever they really SHOULD be doing at that moment.

however, the second option is also tricky.
2. continue working.
the reason this option is equally tricky may have something to do with a little thing called an "all-nighter". This is a close friend to many students who either really have a ton to do, or just tend to procrastinate, like me.

I'm pretty sure it's safe to say that the work always ends up done, some way or another. Unfortunately for me, I realize that no amount of classical music will make me smarter or study better at this point.

So, I will continue studying. I will take my exams, perhaps with the help of a caffeinated drink or two, and I will survive. [hey... hey.......]

Yes... I know it's late.

a postcard from Bali

sometimes all you need to do is get away.



Bali would be nice.

Is it bad?

So I'm thinking it may be a bad sign if I'm already getting ready for Christmas. If I had it my way, I would have completely surrounded myself with Christmas decorations by now. Alas, I am but a poor college student and I have decided to settle on a Christmas-tree scented candle.

I was on the phone with my mom last night and she said she's excited to have me home for Thanksgiving. It was then that we realized we had both unconsciously taken a month off of November, thinking that next week is Thanksgiving. What is it about this time of year that makes weeks run together, holidays not come fast enough, yet are over before we know it?

How good it will feel to go home for maybe a couple hours, just to be crammed into the car again. Since the addition of my two lovely youngest siblings, we typically opt to take two cars on family vacations. Still, 8 people and a black lab the size of a large pony, plus luggage and our contributions to the family Thanksgiving pot luck dinners: always a large load. I can't imagine any other joy I would rather experience right now.

Of course Thanksgiving will always be the red-headed step child in comparison to the greatness that is Christmas. I'm sure my grandmother will continue her annual tradition of recruiting grandkids as troops in attempt to conquer WalMart every Black Friday at 5am. Seriously, she gives us stations. "You go stand by the GPS's... Yo go stand by the digital cameras..." It's intense. She could probably navigate around that store with her eyes closed.

Okay, so I guess Thanksgiving will be enough to tie me over for now. But you best believe that Christmas is always the icing on the cake. Until then, I will be ever hovering over my Balsam Fir Tree scented candle. Joy to the world :)

go...

"Oh, Jo. Jo, you have so many extraordinary gifts; how can you expect to lead an ordinary life? You're ready to go out and - and find a good use for your talent... Go, and embrace your liberty. And see what wonderful things come of it." -little women

hello fall...

we greet thee with open arms!

I went home to Franklin, Tennessee for fall break and the only thing that could have made it better would have been temperatures below 70s. Leiper's Fork is always beautiful, but once those leaves start changing it is absolutely breathtaking. Man's best friend and I went hiking on the Natchez Trace. (Hiking with my sweet dog Moose means traipsing through rivers and various otherwise non-hikable places such as through large drainage pipes. It's quite exciting.) I have taught my dear Moose so well; he somehow maneuvered out of his collar somewhere along our expedition. Clever one, that dog.
My heart was simply giddy looking at the colorful trees against the blue blue sky.

I went on a walk yesterday to take pictures of some places that make me smile here in Knox. It made me appreciate my surroundings a little bit more, but also made me realize my desire for a better camera: a more legit camera if you will. So, as of late, I am trying to figure out ways I can earn money for the camera of my dreamsssss. (Nikon D3000 anyone?) Soooo if anyone has any ideas besides selling my clothes/my plasma let me know. (that last one about the plasma is a semi joke. we'll see how desperate I get...)

The weather is making it terribly hard to stay on task in the world of academia. I've always struggled with this, but wanting to be outside 24/7 sure isn't feeding the flame of desire to study. Along with fall, I have embraced the fact that growing up means making decisions. This has also left me extremely distracted and seemingly absent minded when it comes to my studies. Soon it will all work out and my future self will look back and laugh at my past self.

At least I hope so.

-hv

it's beginning to feel like...

fall. FINALLY. even the fact that it's rainy and drab outside can't kill my mood today.

I almost didn't wake up this morning because the rain was coming down so hard the sun didn't rise! (I mean, I'm sure it did, but I couldn't see it. Therefore I was unable to greet and salute said sunrise, leading to my inability to wake up/get out of bed... ever.) However, I have tried to make the most out of this rainy monday by wearing my new trench coat (THANKS LISA... MOM). The only problem was that this coat did not have a hood to protect my sweet little head from Knoxville's acidic rain.
Problem easily solved: take hood off of another jacket and simply place it on head like hat. BADABING: hood. Nevermind the color difference, because who really cares if I match anyways? If there is actually a person out there who TRULY cares if I match every day or not, I pity the quality of your life. And sorry.

I love it when I ask permission to do something and the response I receive is "go for it".

Like:
Question:"Is anyone sitting here?"
Response: "No. Go for it!"

It's like a little pep talk. Like I have people throughout my whole day whose sole purposes are to give me that one encouraging phrase and smack my butt to get ready for game time. (just kidding about that last part). GO TEAM :)

I just realized I have been sitting here at Starbucks in John Hodges with my head phones on for fifteen minutes... without music. After realizing this, I open my itunes only to have my ears blasted with the highest volume of tunes.

And with that last bit of entertaining news, my table companion puts up her hood and tucks her hair in... to go outside?

false. She just was preparing for the next level her extreme studying sesh. I am now intimidated.

go team. -h.

lessons learned...

so here are a few lessons learned today:

#1: never wear your favorite shirt (or your brand new one) to do the dishes. you will ALWAYS get soapy suds on it. alwaysalwaysalways. don't do it.

#2. ALWAYS wear pants. you never know who might stumble into your room. (this particular lesson was not necessarily LEARNED today, but I was reminded of that one time I learned this lesson before...)

lesson #3; if you have homework, do NOT (and I repeat DO NOT) even think about getting on Facebook. whatever you need to do will never be done... until maybe 3 o'clock.

#4. It is always okay to go into someone else's room when they aren't there. Always. (perhaps to use a can opener or to eat some of their applesauce? just saying...)

#5: It's okay if you get lazy at night and don't charge your phone. Chances are when it dies, (and it will.... eventually) it won't even be that big of a deal and you might even get out of that one alive.

lesson #6, even if you have a scary dream, or a dream where someone does something mean to you or maybe proposes to another girl because he "thought you wouldn't care", it is not really appropriate to take it out on that person the next morning, because they didn't really do anything wrong in real life. (...or DID they? hmm...)

well, consider those lessons learned. I will now attempt to be on task.

-h.

so it's been a long time...

and even though I've been away for a long time, it's probably just because my life is so darn great. And that's not supposed to sound boastful... I've just been so blessed.
I feel a little awkward starting up again after my vow of blog-silence. Should I backtrack completely? Summarize my wonderful summer? Or should I just completely skip that part and not fill in any of the blank spaces of my blogging life?

Hmmm... I've never been good with making decisions. If you know me at all you know this is painfully true.

I guess I'll backtrack, summarize the good things, and leave out all the boring/uninteresting/embarrassing parts of my life as of late.

My summer was marvelous. It was full of laughter and tears, but mostly smiley, sunshiney days when there was nothing else I could do but love life. Camp Vesper Point will always hold a special place in the heart of my childhood, but I'm finding that it has a more lasting impact on my newly found adult life (I am now 20. no more teeny boppers for me!). Camp challenged me in ways I didn't think were humanly possible, and because of that I have learned so much. I was so blessed to be surrounded by the best of friends the entirety of the summer, and I wouldn't have had it any other way.

Wow... my summarizing skills surprise me. Touche self-doubting-self!

I am currently up to my old shenanigans. I have a test in half an hour, and instead of studying studiously, I am checking off things that have been collecting dust on my To Do list. Such as write a letter to my lovely pen pal, or update my dilapidating blog...

SO, as long as I'm getting SOMETHING done, my life is worth while.

SHALOM.

typical college student...

so, being the college student that I am, I am constantly moving and always have things to do. Because of this, I am forced to reconsider what I used to acknowledge as my "eating schedule".

yesterday, I was running a bit late to my first class, so I decided to have a late breakfast. So at 10 I had a bagel and coffee. I continued throughout my busy Monday, and finally finished classes at 4:30.

Now here lies the problem: I had a free dinner at 6:00, but I was STARVING. so naturally, I went to the cafeteria to consume 2 bowls of captain crunch and a couple of cookies beforehand. Of course, the whole time I was eating my subconscious was saying, "you'll be sorry... you'll be sorry... you be sorry..."

And I was.

Oh well. the 6:00 dinner was good, too. Free food is just so hard to pass up sometimes.

And here I am, in the cafeteria again. I had a lovely chat with my girl Janice. She has fly glasses. And six grand boys. We like to laugh together for thirty minutes while I hold my delicious yogurt parfait wishing I could eat it. She was hiding from me when I first came into the cafeteria, but don't worry, I found her.

Soooo... I guess I'll study now? I decided that the cafeteria is a good place to study. Probably because I've set my station up right next to the desert bar. Stellar.

These rainy days make me sleepy. I'm dreaming of spring days and summer nights. Fresh air and carelessness.

tom foolery

in light of certain events this week, (excellent weather, easter break, etc)

my word of the day is tom foolery.

the urban dictionary describes tom foolery as: Wreaking Havoc/causing general chaos/shenanigans....

First of all, may I just point out that shenanigans is an altogether stellar word. And I suppose that "tom foolery" is a phrase, not a word. However, it just seems fitting for this week.
ex. I am going home today, and much tom foolery will be going down.

You better recognize.

So, after a fun and music-filled car ride in Collin's stellar gold jeep, I am finally back home in good ole Leiper's Fork. I just finished giving my precious little sister a bath. She is absolutely gorgeous and is growing like a weed.


Currently my eight year old brother is running laps around our house because he got in trouble.

it's 10:00.

I love my family. I miss it so much. It is so so so so so good to be home. What a blessing my family is to me! THANK YOU, LORD!

In this moment, this is my shalom.

h.

"studying"

Currently I am in the library with some very stellar friends "studying"... also known as running around the 6th floor, climbing through empty bookshelves, and finding little unknown crannies in the library with comfy chairs!

the Urban Dictionary very correctly defines studying as: "what you're avoiding right now".

Right on target, Urban Dictionary. I am thoroughly impressed.

I have done everything from facebook, youtube, stumble upon, twitter, itunes, and solitaire in attempt to avoid my studying. I have also visited Starbucks twice, where I met a new friend Ayanle who is from Somalia. He moved to the United States in 2001. He lived in California for a year and then moved here. He doesn't know why, but he has friends so it's okay. He says I have a lot of friends. I said yes. I mean, I think I have a lot of friends. He was real nice and said that if I didn't like the Dark Cherry Mocha that, yes, he WOULD make me another drink. I debated on whether I should lie to him and say that I didn't like it so I could get a free drink, but I decided that I liked him too much to lie. That would build a rotten foundation for our new-found friendship.

So now I'm drinking some rockin' organic milk. the vanilla kind. it's pretty much wonderful.

I told my friend Allie that I would tell her something embarrassing about myself if she sent me a package of my most favorite things!! She agreed. Alas, I cannot think of what favorite things I would like for her to send me. So that gives me yet another thing to think about besides studying. Because obviously my list of favorite things is much more important than my midterm tomorrow.

soooo.... I guess I should attempt to study now...
which according to Urban dictionary is avoiding to study...
so by me saying that I am about to study, I am really saying that I am about to NOT study.

Which is exactly what I'm about to do.

h.

monsters

"we stop looking for monsters under our bed because we realized they were inside us"

The weather was gorgeous today. I feel like it was a little package sent from God saying "hey, I know life is hard sometimes, but look at my creation. It rocks, right?"

Yes. Yes is does rock. Thanks God. You're the best.

So lately I've been thinking about how jubilant life would be if we acted like children. We could play together and not worry about money, or homework. But we could be free. Children are so quick to believe in things, ( which makes it fun to mess around with them ) but I wish I had faith like a child. I have gotten to the point where I feel so independent and "grown up" that I no longer am able to put my trust into things that aren't concrete. Why do we feel the need to question everything?

Today in RUF, we talked about how God is offering us complete restoration, we just have to accept it. Inside, no matter how put together we seem, we have monsters. We can try and try to get rid of them ourselves, but the only one who can fully restore us is Him. He is pursuing us, why aren't we answering? WE ARE GLORIOUS RUINS. We are broken and restoration will hurt, but the promise of reconciliation is so beautiful!

So, as I sit here and eat my natural cheetos, I am asking God to give me faith like a child, so I can trust Him and be restored.

h.

queen..

it's true that I am the queen of procrastination. Here I am, in the middle of the night, doing pretty much absolutely nothing. Although my inspiration is highly lacking right now, God has definitely given me a glimpse of the beauty He sees in this world. I long to see the beauty in everything surrounding me; I yearn to see the world like He does. The Lord says "TAKE HEART! for I have overcome the world!" Oh what a beautiful mess this world is. Thank the Lord that He shows us His mercy.

have heart.

h.