Monday

oh dad..


Sooo, not much has happened during day 2 of being mom, despite the one real-life tornado that I napped through. I guess it's a good thing when nothing happens worth blogging about.

Oh except for when I got in my bed last night. (exhausted, having only slept for a collective 7 hours ALL weekend. all. week. end. tired.) My nose then directed my attention to a certain potent and very disagreeable odor, which turned out to be a little "present" from the cats.

Please allow me to go off on a tangent at this particular moment. I hold a very strong opinion about cats. Basically, I believe that all cats are lazy, self-righteous, lacking in personality, and pretty much a waste of anyone's time, space, or breathing air.

That being said, I cannot tell you with written words how I felt upon discovering this. Lets just say the first words that came to my mind were not G-rated. I then took the opportunity to wash all my bedding. Isn't that completely normal? Washing sheets at such an ungodly hour?
...I double-washed just to be safe.

In other news, the weather has been testing everyone's limits today. Earlier today I was texting my dad (who is staying with his parents in Chattanooga), and our conversation went something like this:

dad: sitting in dark at mama and daddy's. storm hit sig mtn hard. prob no power for a couple days. lost 1 big oak and rv shed on garage. House is fine, send krystals.
me: ... are you asking for krystals hamburgers?
dad: The #1 combo would be fine: 4 krystals, fries and a diet coke.
me: ... I'll get that to you as soon as possible.
dad: Thx.

In case you have absolutely no sense of humor whatsoever, the irony in this conversation is that the only thing he wants is krystals. Not for the power to come back on, or even the revival of that big oak tree... just krystals.
I've debated sending that text conversation to crazythingsparentstext.com (which has been one of my most recent internet obsessions. You should check it out), yet I am still undecided.
-mom

Sunday

update.

Dear Fellow Bloggers,

I'M BACK!

I have returned from my two month long Sabbatical (I can't tell you how long it just took me to spell that word). I know you all have been biting your fingernails and holding on to your horses just waiting for the day that I write a new post. Well, blogging world, today is your lucky day! (I would like to now give a shout-out to my two readers,
HANNAH ZEHRING and LAURA KETOLA. love you guys).
Tons has happened since I last sat down to reveal all my secret thoughts. I am currently taking a semester off of school and trying to figure out where the heck to go from here. I am also living at home.
Which brings me to our next segment called:

THE PERKS OF BEING A LIVE-IN BABYSITTER/MOM
For those of you who are unaware, I am second in the lineup of a family with 6 kids. I am the oldest girl. This makes me very eligible for many things including the obvious: babysitter, cook (failure), maid, pep-talker, and all-around best daughter award. I have thus embraced these titles along with the not-so obvious such as: dance party organizer, nail-painter, boxcar derby maker, and an overall general encyclopedia.

My parents are out of town for the week, leaving my brother and I in charge of the pack. It's like herding sheep. Or giving a cat a bath. Nearly impossible.

Tonight's endeavors lead to the following:
1. dinner of chicken shaped like dinosaurs and volcano potatoes
2. dinner conversation convincing my 15 year old sister that she is adopted. from China.
3. an after dinner dance party accompanied by music from glee
4. which evolved into everyone leaving
5. and then me serenading my dog with Katy Perry's Teenage Dream.
6. then discovering my little sister armed with the phone and the yellow pages. not good.
7. then ALSO discovering my other little sister carrying around fingernail polish remover. without the lid. she is five. even more not good.
8. me reading goodnight moon.
9. me taking my sister's temperature because her belly button hurt... yeah. I know.

So far so good. Everyone is alive. No broken bones. No hurt feelings. No fevers (despite the belly-button scare). I think we might all survive this one.
Until next time,

mom (h.)